January 19, 1959 — After the final curtain at a performance of “The Festival,” Longacre Theatre, New York City

Ladies and gentlemen. I’m not accustomed to going on stage. I am generally back stage or at home pounding a typewriter. We think we have a funny show. But somewhere along the line we missed the boat with the morning critics. We have no bubble baths, no bumps or grinds or brothels, just a clean show.

We think we have a very funny show. So I am asking each of you to get on the telephone tomorrow morning and call five people. Tell them to come immediately. When I say immediately, I mean it.

Source: The New York Times, January 20, 1955, p. 35.